No return [Post TG, willing ID]

 No return [Post TG, willing ID]

(Potential TW: Gender dysphoria)

Hello everyone. Before we get started, I'd just like to warn you that this is not like my other stories. It's not particularly a fetish piece (unless it does the job, in which case pop off I guess). Secondly, I'd like to say that this is a VERY rough draft of a story that I put together in one sitting. It explores a theme that I've been meaning to use for a little while now but never really had the patience, so this is more the skeleton of a story over a story itself, if that makes sense

TL;DR: Rough draft, no physical TG. Enjoy!

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“I want to forget.” Emma stated, suddenly. Olivia paused, glancing up at her friend. Emma stared at the table, almost shamefully, unwilling to make eye contact.

“What?” Olivia mumbled, confused. “Forget about what?”

“…Him.” Emma replied, looking up at her friend in newfound confidence. “I want to forget about… Him. You know what I mean.”

“I… I’m sorry, Em, but I don’t.” Olivia apologised. “I didn’t even know there was a ‘him’ in your life.” The brunette tried her best to read her friend, to get a glimpse into what she was thinking, where this bizarre request had come from. But alas, Emma gave no response.

“…You’re right.” Emma sighed, “There isn’t one. That was… stupid of me. I’m sorry.” Olivia still examined her friend as they sat at the table of the coffee shop, her hasty backtracking only piquing the young woman’s interest further. Emma had always been a quiet type, always one for beating around the bush, afraid to ask directly for what she wanted. Hell, Olivia had ordered her coffee for her earlier! So, it was only natural that the blunt nature of her sudden request had startled her somewhat. Whatever this was, was clearly bugging her friend.

 

“Em, what’s wrong?” Olivia finally broke after a moment’s silence. Emma looked at her, contemplation in her eyes. It was clear that something was on her mind, but for whatever reason, she felt a reluctance to tell her, but why? Was she..? Oh my…

“You’re seeing a guy?” Olivia asked, smiling as Emma’s eyes widened in embarrassment.

“What? God, no!” She confirmed, seemingly offended at even the mention of a male. “No, I’m still firmly batting for girls!” Olivia couldn’t help but smirk at the sight of her friend squirming just at the idea. “No, um… it’s something else, actually.” Emma’s expression dropped as she looked at her friend. “It’s been a couple years since… the incident, right?” She asked, Olivia’s heart dropping at the mention.

“Yeah…”  the brunette responded, her tone sombre. “Listen, Em, I’m still so sorry. I don’t know what happened, I just dropped the remote, and then…” she paused, choosing her words carefully.

“And then I was Emma.” She responded for her. “I know, Liv. It took me two days to convince you who I was. It did a number on you pretty good.” Emma pushed a strand of pink hair out of her face as she continued. “At least you finally came to. Unlike everybody else.” Olivia nodded. It was true, she’d managed to come to, but everyone else, her friends, her family, her own parents… they all thought of her as Emma. No recollection of the past, just the reality in front of them. It was… heartbreaking, but she recovered well.

“Yeah, that was a weird couple of months.” Olivia smiled, “I had to teach you so much.”

“I know… I still haven’t gotten the hang of high heels!” Emma responded, the pair laughing at the memory of Emma stumbling around her bedroom in shoes too small for her. “It really made me respect you, Liv.”

“Really?” Olivia was taken aback by the sudden praise. She’d always tiptoed around the subject in the past, afraid that reminders would induce a wave of abuse and emotion from Emma for ruining her life is ways beyond comprehension. “I… really thought you hated me.” She continued, hardly believing the words coming out of her mouth. “I stole your life from you, and then you were stuck with me. You had every right to hate me.”

Emma nodded. “I did.” She affirmed, much to Olivia’s dismay. “I really, really did.” A chilling silence filled the air around the table, the common murmur of the coffee shop a cold comfort to the pair.

“Emma… I don’t know what to say.” Olivia spoke hesitantly. “I had no idea what that remote would do. I’m so sorry tha-“

“Liv, please. You don’t need to apologise.” Emma was quick to assure her friend. “It’s true. I hated you. You did steal my life away. I was stuck with you, at least I was if I wanted to maintain a crumb of sanity.” Emma sighed, as if she were about to unload a huge weight. “But you dropping that damn remote, making me… me. It was the best thing that ever happened to me.” She smiled, taking a moment to allow the words to set in. “Yeah, it took me forever to get used to it all. The bra’s, the period’s, the heels… but once I did, it felt so natural. It’s all I ever wanted to be.” Emma looked Olivia in the eyes, the latter struggling to hide her surprise. “You ever wonder why I never asked you to change me back?”

“I guess… now that you mention it, you never did…” Olivia stared, thinking out loud as she processed the question. How had she never noticed? Had she seriously been that oblivious? “I guess in the chaos of it all, the question never crossed my mind… For what it’s worth, I couldn’t. What the remote does is… irreversible. At least I think so.” The brunette couldn’t help but feel she had let her friend down. What if she’d only reached this conclusion because she had no choice? What if the effects had manipulated her mind? “Are you… sure?”

“Sure about what? Wanting this?” Emma questioned in response. “I’ve never been so sure.” The pair locked eyes for a moment, Sincerity in both. “That’s why I want to forget.”

“Oh…” Olivia gasped in realisation, “You don’t mean..?”

“I want to forget about him.”

 

Olivia shook her head in disbelief as she locked the bathroom door behind her. What was she thinking, what was she THINKING? This… was wrong, right? She couldn’t just let her do that, right? She began to hyperventilate as her thoughts spiralled. This was because of her. It was her fault. Who the fuck was she to start messing with reality itself? She’d promised herself she’d never touch that remote again, and now her best friend wants her to willingly manipulate her to- UGH! This was too much, this wa-

“Liv, you in here?” the gentle knocking of Emma tore Olivia from her trance. “The ladies’ room wasn’t the best place to hide, Hun, I’m allowed in here too…” The bathroom door opened as Olivia pulled her friend in quickly, closing the door behind her. “Liv, please, listen to me…”

“No, Emma, No. You’re asking me to fuck with reality, the fuck with YOU!” Olivia interrupted, a tear rolling down her face. “I’m not doing that again.”

“Liv… It’s not like that.” Emma comforted her friend, wiping her tear from her cheek. “I just… I hate my old self. I hate my old life, I hate my old name. I wish they never existed.”

“I know, but you can’t just… that’s life, Emma!” Olivia hit back, the first sign of tension between the two forming. “You can’t just change things like that!”
“But you can.” Emma responded sternly, “WE can. We can live our perfect lives; we can change our world!”

“Well, maybe I don’t want to.” Olivia cried, tears streaming more consistently down her face now. Though it was her true thoughts, the young brunette immediately covered her mouth, secretly desiring to retract them from memory.

“You? This has nothing to do with you?” Emma hissed, her sincerity bleeding into anger. “This is my life. My memories. I can choose what I do with them if I have the power, no?” Olivia hesitated. She was right. Who was she to deny her this chance? Why should she stand in her way?

“I know… I’m sorry.” Olivia sighed. “It’s just… I promised never to use the remote again. It’s dangerous.” She spoke with sincerity, Emma’s reaction somewhat more understanding. “Before our accident… I used it a lot. I made a lot of changes that you don’t know about, Em.” She explained as the two women leaned back against the wall of the bathroom, backing down from their respective corners. “I used it recklessly. I used it to hook up with a lot of guys, I used it to hook up with even more girls. Shit, you think I was just born this hot?” Emma laughed in response. “I know you think I was born into a rich family. But I wasn’t… the remote made that happen. It was fun. But it was dangerous. I knew that… but I used it anyway. I was selfish and I was greedy. I changed other people, Em. I changed you.” Olivia turned to Emma. “When you changed, it got me too… If you hadn’t have chased me down for days, I’d have no idea. You’d have been left completely alone in a new body with nobody to help you. It made me think… what if I’ve done that to others? What if there are hundreds of people like you who are just… stuck? I hated it, Em. I swore off the remote for good that day. I locked it away in the attic. I don’t know if I can go back.” The two sat in silence for a moment. The muffled chatter of the café barely audible though the padded door.

“Liv…” Emma started, her brown eyes glinting in the light, “I completely understand. But please, I want this.” Olivia glanced down at the floor as Emma continued, “Nobody remembers who I was before this except me, Liv. Nobody. That’s a curse that only I bear, do you know how horrible that feels?” Emma’s tone began to rise again as the frustration of the situation continued.

“I remember.” Olivia weakly suggested, much to Emma’s dismissal.

“No, you don’t.” Emma scoffed. “You know I was somebody else, but you don’t remember who.” She responded, numbly. This time, it was her turn to cry.

“Yes, I do…” Olivia asserted, a hint of confidence in her voice.

“What was my name?” Emma asked in a monotone, almost condescending tone.

“I… don’t remember.” Olivia conceded.

“Exactly.” Emma responded, “And you-“

“But I remember you. I remember how you talked. How you laughed, how you cried. I remember when you were happy, when you were angry. I remember your eyes, your hair, I remember everything about you.” Olivia watched the tears roll down Emma’s face, dripping off her cheeks and staining her white shirt. “And you’ve always been Emma. Always.”

“Really?” Emma asked.

“Really.” Olivia affirmed.

Emma smiled, an honest joy in her eyes.

“That’s great.” She spoke. “Now please, let me believe that too.”

 

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“Ok.” Olivia started, opening the safe that she pulled from the attic. “Our deal is that we use this once.” She gestured to the remote as she picked up the device. “Then we destroy it, no matter what, okay?” Emma nodded, unable to hide her excitement. “Okay. So, umm… let me see here.” The young woman began fiddling with the remote, pressing a number of buttons. “I haven’t used this since the incident, so… it might take a minute.” She explained apologetically.

“That’s okay!” Emma beamed, watching her friend as she worked away. “So… are you gonna make any commands?”

“What?” Olivia asked genuinely, continuing to fiddle with the remote. “Like? With the remote?”

“Yeah.” Emma nodded, “Y’know, since we’re pulling it out for one last crack, got any last requests for the mysterious machine?” she joked, playfully knocking Olivia’s arm.

“hmmm…” the young woman thought aloud. “I guess one.” Emma tilted her head in curiosity.

“and… what’s that?” she inquired. Olivia taking a breath in response.

“I’m… gonna make the remote disappear.” She revealed, “I don’t want it to change anybody else. So, I’m getting rid of it for good.”

“Figures.” Emma agreed. “Honestly, I don’t know if I’ll even remember it exists after this so, no complaints I guess.”

“No, no one will.” Olivia continued. “There must be no breadcrumbs to follow. It’s gone.” The brunette finished, “here”, she said, handing her friend the device, “check over this.”

Emma glanced down at the remote now in her hands, a small device, shaped similarly to a TV remote, decorated with buttons all over its sleek edges. In the centre lay an LED screen, with 8-bit text reading:

 

COMMANDS:

EMMA ROSE HAS ALWAYS BEEN EMMA ROSE

EMMA ROSE HAS NO MEMORY OF BEING ANYBODY ELSE

EMMA ROSE’S MALE MEMORIES WILL BE REPLACED BY FEMALE MEMORIES

THIS DEVICE WILL CEASE TO EXIST

ALL LIVING BEINGS WILL CEASE TO REMEMBER ANY EVIDENCE OF THIS DEVICE

 

“Huh.” Emma mumbled in bemusement. “I didn’t expect it to be so… simple.” Olivia giggled in agreement. “So, are we ready to go, or what?” Emma asked, her finger hovering over the ‘enter’ button, ready to press.

“Wait!” Olivia cried, hurriedly. “Before you do anything, I have to say… This change… It will affect me too. Once you press that button, there’s no going back. The old you will be completely gone.” Olivia spoke with genuine concern. Emma paused for a moment. Considering the information given to her.

“I know.” She responded. “The old me… is already gone.” She smiled. “I’m just… finally letting go.”

“Okay. If you’re happy, then I’m happy.” Olivia confirmed. “But one last thing. Our memories. These last two years. I can’t guarantee they’ll stay the same.” she continued. “This time we spent together, me teaching you how to do all these things, I don’t think there’ll be there once you press that button.”

“Really?” Emma asked, a bittersweet feeling building in her stomach. “Ok, then. Before we do it, could I add something?” she asked, Olivia nodding in approval. “I need a failsafe… just in case, y’know?”

“Go ahead.” Olivia gestured, welcomingly. Emma smiled as she typed a message into the machine, before passing the remote back to Olivia. The latter glancing at the screen as it read:

 

EMMA ROSE IS STILL IN LOVE WITH OLIVIA DANIELS

 

“…I” Olivia was interrupted as her lips were met by Emma’s. A soothing warmth flowed through her as they held for a moment. Olivia closing her eyes as she let the moment take her over. Their lips parting as Emma held her cheek

“I love you, Olivia.” She whispered softly, holding her gaze.

“I… Love you, Emma.” Olivia replied weakly, still shellshocked from the sudden surprise.

“I… Think I’m ready.” Emma whispered.

“Yeah… me too.” Olivia replied, holding the device up and holding her finger over the enter button. “On the count of three… our new life…

 

One….

Two….

Three.

 

*FLASH*